Off the Agenda: Conversations for Building Church Leaders

I spent the better part of two years looking at congregational websites as I wrote my doctoral dissertation in the field of communication studies. One of the things I noticed was the strategic use of links by congregations to communicate their values.

Almost every church wants to express a warm welcome to potential visitors. Some use: “Welcome!” or “Christ Church extends a warm welcome” or “Join us for worship.”

Other church websites provide links specifically for newcomers: “New to Christ Church? Click here.” Or “Information for Visitors.” Sometimes the link for newcomers is placed on a menu, but often the link is set apart with large type or a graphic. Sometimes the page for visitors is structured in a question-and-answer format with questions about location of the church, what to wear, what to expect during a typical worship service, and so on. Sometimes the link takes the viewer to a letter (or video) from the minister expressing welcome and giving basic information about the church.

Which strategy is more welcoming—words of invitation or links for newcomers?

Most people in Christian leadership love words and believe in their power. But this can blind us to the power inherent in website structure—which is based on hyperlinks—to communicate values. The links used on a homepage of a church’s website communicate what matters to that congregation, without using the word “values” or “priorities.”

Continue reading "How Websites Communicate Congregational Values"...

I’ve attended—and volunteered in—several churches. And in some of them, I’ve made the mistake of volunteering for too much. By now, I’ve learned to draw reasonable boundaries based on my gifts and my limitations. And I accept responsibility for the times when I have overcommitted.

At the same time, I believe I faced more pressure from church staff members than I should have. Church leaders were more than happy to accept any volunteer effort I was willing to give. They never stopped asking for more. In fact, one youth pastor told me he expected my volunteer efforts to be like a part-time job. I didn’t have time or energy for a part-time job on top of my full-time work. And if I had, I might have looked for one that paid.

I’m not sure volunteers should have to work so hard to draw and maintain boundaries—and fend off the church’s requests for more of their time and energy.

Continue reading "Should You Stop Asking for Volunteers?"...

Several years ago, my pastor left our church and moved 45 minutes away to plant a congregation. Thankfully, he had a family of six, so that more than doubled the waiting group of five people.

My wife and I decided to join the group because we're church-planting junkies; if we're not sitting on folding chairs, we don't know how to worship God. Still, it had been some time since our church fit in a living room and served Holy Communion from a card table.

I figured the new church would soon be like the former one, for it had the same senior pastor, the same worship style, a similar location, and, including our family, 10 of the same people.
I was wrong, hilariously wrong.

The church became radically different from its ancestor. Their demographics, passions, and projects diverged widely, even wildly. One example: They have a ministry for home-schooling families; we have one for Gen-Y professionals. The churches stand as a case study for Lyle Schaller's point that churches are progressively becoming more unlike each other.

That fact challenges every church leader today to discern and affirm the congregation's unique spiritual calling. This sounds easy, but it's surprisingly difficult. To understand and accept these people, to see what God wants to do in and through them, requires us to lay down much of what we know and what seminars teach. It requires listening and letting go of our plans.

It's much faster, when entering a church, to franchise, to use an approach proven in a larger congregation. It worked there, it should here. (Besides, we like that approach.)

Continue reading "What We Have Uncommon"...

When our small staff (of two) met for a long-term planning and goals review, my colleague was visibly stressed. She said, "My whole life is church. I'm drained, rather than energized, by ministry. I want to be able to go home without thinking about work all the time."

We talked about delegating some of her duties. But she was already delegating effectively. Then we talked about her schedule. She produced a "to do" list with 64 items on it. No wonder she felt pressured!

Her list included everything from meetings and telephone calls to recruiting ministry volunteers and revising ministry positions. With the help of another set of eyes, she realized some of the duties could be delegated. But it still left an intimidating list and an incredible mess on her monthly planner.

Eventually we arrived at a simple but effective way of keeping priorities straight and burdens in perspective.

Continue reading "Is Your "To Do's" List Too Long?"...

The number one reason that pastors leave their ministries is “wives issues,” according to a 2007 Time magazine article. I would take some comfort in that statistic—that the number one reason they leave isn’t sexual sin or burnout—but the Bible teaches that neglecting an obligation to care for family is its own form of moral failure. (Here I’m thinking of Ephesians 5, but I don’t think Jesus is far from this in the beginning of Matthew 15, either.)

Up until last July, I doubted the prevalence of stress placed on pastors’ spouses. But when we launched a Survival Guide entitled “Help for the Pastor’s Spouse,” and it became one of our most popular downloads, I had to admit that the stress was more common than I ever expected. For a succinct understanding of why, consider the opening paragraph from that Time article:

HELP WANTED: Pastor's wife. Must sing, play music, lead youth groups, raise seraphic children, entertain church notables, minister to other wives, have ability to recite Bible backward and choreograph Christmas pageant. Must keep pastor sated, peaceful and out of trouble. Difficult colleagues, demanding customers, erratic hours. Pay: $0.

Yes, it’s a cynical view of the role—or vocation—of a pastor’s spouse. But it rings true for many ministry wives, and it drives many of them to create networks on the internet and beyond.

These networks build themselves around the pain points (and, to a lesser extent, the shared joys) of marriage to a minister. Unless we want our churches to bear the burden of a pastor’s strained marriage—or the wreckage of a broken marriage—it would be wise for leaders to periodically consider the pain points and ask a few questions:

Continue reading "Remembering the Pastor’s Spouse"...

I recently wrote about the results of a leadership-style assessment I took on BuildingChurchLeaders.com, and my ability to finally accept the idea that I can be effective and influential as a leader whose primary gifting lies in the areas of encouragement and motivation. I do not have to be primarily gifted in the areas popularized by leadership circles and books, such as vision-casting, to succeed in the ways God has called me, and this realization was quite liberating for me.

Now that a few weeks have passed, I’ve had a chance to think a bit more about what this gifting means. A sobering thought has emerged.

All leaders, whether they realize it or not, are motivating or demotivating those around them. It simply depends on the ways we as leaders conduct ourselves. Either we use encouragement in authentic and effective ways to spur motivation, or we risk catalyzing the opposite effect. There is no in-between.

So with that said, here are six ways I believe you can effectively energize people, giving them the encouragement they need to kick up their efforts another notch. I pray these ideas help you do just that, whether encouragement is a primary gift of yours or not.

First, a disclaimer: I believe these are six ways to authentically encourage people around you, but I am not an expert on the subject. I have much to learn, and I’m sure those around me can quickly point out my shortcomings on this topic. Please join in the conversation and add your own ideas:

Continue reading "How to Authentically Encourage"...